Lost and Not Yet Found.

@ Caparica (beach)Image

It feels so strange being here on my own. I know it’s only been three weeks so this feeling is completely natural but I’m so used to being surrounded by people I know and hearing police cars from my bedroom window late at night and hearing foxes and cats making weird noises in my back garden lol, sounds like a mess but anything beats the silence here tbh.  It’s all so different now. There are people here that I know, but who I’m yet to regard as ‘friends’. How can I best describe what this experience currently feels like? Hmmm.. It’s kind of like purposely losing yourself on your own far out at sea with no lifejacket and trying to see if by God’s grace you can make it back to shore. Only, I just feel like I’m floating and probably in the wrong direction at that lol. I’m going through the motions really like I’m here, but I’m not here here (for those of you who know me you’ll know what that is and I love you for that! lol) Maybe I’m closed? because all I can think about is getting back home to London, which is crazy because I know once this is all over I’ll probably be saying “wow what a great experience I want to go back!”. I don’t really know what I was expecting from Portugal but I’m here now and I feel kinda stuck. Maybe it has to do with the space I’m in right now within myself or maybe I’m just being ungrateful? I don’t know. It will take time to settle I know that. I just didn’t expect home to feel so far away.

Walking towards O Castelo d. Sao JorgeImage

I can find my way around here fairly easily now, but I still get lost quite a lot actually lol,  I’m still yet to master my ‘street wise’ skills. A lot of the houses and mews look the same so it’s so easy to take a wrong turning. To be fair it’s very touristic around here as I live near Graça which is considered one of the ‘trendy’ areas in Lisbon. Not to mention the large number of tourist attractions ranging from monuments to Fado Houses to famous bars and restaurants, to jazz clubs etc. (pics of those coming soon) During this time of the year there are many foreigners here like myself which keeps this area rather interesting and busy. I feel like I should be liking it all. But I just feel stuck. The 9to5 life is definitely a challenge as I’ve never experienced working it before. It’s a great opportunity to see how the ‘real world’ works I guess but it can become difficult to stay consistently motivated when your mind and heart are longing to be elsewhere at times. Nevertheless, this is not a holiday as my boss keeps reminding me haha. I just have to keep my eye on the prize. I’m here to create more opportunities for myself and my future so for now I guess you could call these my doors of opportunity. 😀

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Lisbon is a perfect place for two, there are so many interesting things to do and places to explore that are just kind of awkward if you try and do on your own – unless you’re a photographer or a self volunteered lonely backpacker.

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There’s so much that can be seen taking a tram (n.28E) from my house right up until the Basilica

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Oh and I can’t forget their House of Parliament!…

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It’s even more stunning and huge in person!

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There are various other forms of transportation tourists take to go sightseeing such as the big red bus…

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And last for this post but certainly not least, there are a large number of gift shops around here, it’s literally like being in Piccadilly or Oxford Circus. They’re all pretty much the same but they all offer lovely gifts, hats, mugs, t-shirts and postcards etc. you know the essential ‘bring back home’ pressies for the family.

Looking at postcards afora da uma loja de recordações (a gift shop) at the CasteloImage

More posts coming soon…

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